In which I complain. And need a hug.

[inmyriadbits]

*sigh* I have to go run some errands, and I started doing that thing where I go "Well, maybe I should wear this cool skirt, I never really find a good time to wear it, but then I need this other thing, and then the shoes..." until it becomes more complicated than it should be and then frustratingly just isn't right for some reason. And then I run out of energy and don't end up going anywhere and change back into my pajamas. Does anyone else do this?

I think a lot of the problem was that I went to a full yoga session for the first time in a REALLY long time (as in, years). It wiped me out. Also, the puppies have been insanely hyper and biting everything recently, which means I'm just getting frustrated at them without being able to enjoy compensatory cuddling. That sucked a lot yesterday, when it was raining and freezing and I couldn't take them outside to run around in circles. Or, you know, go to the bathroom. I spent literally hours chasing around the house cleaning up after them and being robbed of any desire to go swing-dancing.

Ugh, I'm just tired. You know what would be great? If Nickelodeon would please start broadcasting new episodes of Avatar. Ditto for Fox regarding Bones. Where are my happy-making shows at? I ask you.

My 21st birthday is on Monday. This should not really be a reason for complaint, since a) birthday, and b) legal to buy alcohol, but I have had really disappointing experiences with my birthday the past few years. And before that, they weren't anything special either (it just only started sucking recently when I started hoping for more and not getting it). And as much as I love Katie, always sharing your special day with someone else isn't that great sometimes. As for this year, I'm away from the majority of my friends, and I've been struggling with depression and thus haven't been making tons of new friends, so I basically have a grand total of maybe five people I might want to celebrate with, and most of them don't know each other, and the ones that do, don't really like each other. I want something special, and what I'm going to get is dinner with my parents where maybe the highlight will be getting carded. I'm trying not to be disappointed, because I know I don't deal with disappointment well (it's a serious flaw), but the alternative is to not have any expectations at all, and that's almost worse. So. What's a girl to do? At the very least, I'd like it not to bring me down during SXSW.

And the puppies are going back tomorrow. It's going to make me cry a lot, in public. I just know it.

Comments

[joandarck.livejournal.com]

it becomes more complicated than it should be and then frustratingly just isn't right for some reason. And then I run out of energy and don't end up going anywhere and change back into my pajamas. Does anyone else do this?

Yes! I used to miss classes because of that in college, because you hit a point where you (think you) are looking increasingly freakish with each new change, and the later you'd be walking in, the more conspicuous you'd be, the more important it is not to look freakish. It sounds silly but it's really quite upsetting when that particular compulsion attacks out of nowhere. I mean, I really panic.

[inmyriadbits.livejournal.com]

God, yes! It's like the sartorial equivalent of seeing a word too much and having it start looking completely bizarre, I think. Only, with more anxiety. Man, that metaphor got away from me...